Grammy's First Text - mixed emojicons

fun with the English laguage

My Grammy sends me her first text today

My Gentleman FRIEND
texted me on Messenger last night.
(I KNOW... FACEBOOK HAS A FRIEND)
His message said,
"ok having trouble with my cellphone. hooking up wifi now."

I dont know what he meant so i waited. 
And he hangs up on me. 
Ok though. I thought...
He is only a FACEBOOK FRIEND.

Then he calls me back and apologizes. 
So we re good again.
we chat a little while more.

Then as the evening goes on
he sends me the message
"My signal is down on the router."

So I told him,
"its ok, Honey,
I have some medicine to help with that.  That is what VIAGRA is for.
Do you need 50 or 100 mg?
I've ģot both."

Like an Onion, MANY LAYERS

An excerpt taken from FB users also in
FORENSICS

Today I had an experience that made me realize that no matter how tough life can get for me many have it worse.  I'm so saddened and angry with our government. So here it goes.
          I went up to Spinx to grab a few things. When I came back out this older man was soaking wet walking out across the street from the woods he lives in and getting under the shelter outside Spinx (it was pouring rain). So I put my stuff in the car and walked up to him he was shaking he was so cold and wet. I tried to give him money, but he wouldn't take it. I gave him a dry sweater and blanket. So I asked if I could buy him food and drinks, and he just started crying told me he likes hot dogs and lemonade. So I went in and bought it for him and he started to sob telling me he's a homeless Vietnam war vet. I went to hug him and thank him for his Service. He said I'm wet and probably don't smell the best.  I reassured him that it didn't bother me one bit. He cried in my arms ,and I too lost it BC I'm from a military family. Homeless and vet should never be in the same sentence. It's a travesty.  Then a nice young man came over and he's taking him to the salvation army so he can get clean dry clothes and a bed.
I know how a lot of people feel and love calling folks bums but we don't know everyone's story. sometimes all we need to do is listen.

My comment
God called. said your Guy should .hold you tight as he counts his blessings.  only time "present company is always excluded" RULE DOES NOT APPLY
Gr8 day for all involved.
Job well done To your PARENTS.

It is a man's job to respect women but it is a woman's job to give them something to respect.

My closing comment

A SAINT and a Preacher... and forensics... Good tree you fell from.

Can't Answer Now TOO MANY PEOPLE; TOO MUCH NOISE

A glimpse into how YOUR life would be different if we were

REAL FRIENDS vs. FACEBOOK FRIENDS:

I have a good friend who lives in Africa, where I am contributing my efforts to fot current projects, which take my time from blogging,  until today.

My Friend, whom I have called MR PRESIDENT since meeting and learning he wants to be.  Today I call him and he does not answer because he is riding on the city bus... WELL READ.  THIS IS WHAT YOUR DAY COULD BE LIKE IF we are friends.

"Am on a bus

--Mr President missed a call from you.--

There is noise here

Give me 5 minutes"

tell evryone 2b
QUIET.
Future PRESIDENT commands your attention NOW!

"Hehehe

Yeah

Am off the bus"

then say
me needs to tell you
something
then when the hush falls over the city
stick your tongue out,
wet your lips
not that much...
just a little.
then put ur tongue out a little n blow bubbles so spit flies out some.
then regain your composure n say
my PEEBLES,
A gr8 tym is upon us
then stutter as you repeat Abr5aham  Lincoln' s
gettysburg address

fffff.  ffffff     fffff
fffffooo.  ffffooouuuu
4
oh f*** this
n get off the bus

Hahaha

A NON-POLITICAL VIEW - Shape of the Economy

FACEBOOK POST TODAY
BY FRIEND 6GUNNER (Military)

This is the LAST time I will post about, respond to or rehash ANYTHING concerning the Syria bombing by US forces that left that fuckin pile of shit desert airbase FUNCTIONAL after a dark hour attack.
*The cost of a single Tomahawk unit was $823,400+
We (the US government)launched 59 of them
*The cost (not including man hours and powering the 2 destroyers) is roughly $48,580,600
*Tomahawk missiles costs have risen to slightly above $1.5M per unit (just focus on the 59 used, NOT munitions UPGRADES) to produce
*As it stands as of October 2016's last estimate, repairing Flint, Michigan's pipes from main to home (in totality) is around $400M
*Meals On Wheels is a part of a $3B government grant block (costing around $2.5K per homebound senior citizen) which is on the chopping block
*The "America First" (skinny budget plan)calls for around a 13.4-13.7% slash in the educational budget (around $9-13B)
*The FIREWORKS were to show a sovereign nation's leader (as tyrannical insane as he may be) that he can't just torture or kill his country's citizens without the US (as foreign entity) not issuing a spanking, of sorts
*There's STILL a travel ban in place for Syrian refugees

I WOULD SIMPLY like for someone to make sense of how we can have a leader that out right said "From this point, it's America FIRST. AMERICA FIRST..." yet we have slashed budgets that benefited both the elderly & the youth, Flint, Michigan's repair project is moving at a crippled snail's pace and we just blew almost $50M for a light show giving an adversary the room to wiggle itself in a position of intercessor (ironically, on the UN's behalf) or the guy that won't let the neighborhood bully pick on the little kid?
*** THINK CAREFULLY -- I mean with a scientist's knowledge of measurement -- how you respond. I will be screen shooting  ANY & EVERYTHING that is said TO the POSED question and tweeting directly to the POTUS, his COS, press secretary, SOD & EVERY major news outlet there is so that they too may see.
**** ALL (REGARDLESS OF WHO YOU ARE OR HOW I KNOW YOU) STRAYING from the PROPOSED topic will be DELETED at my discretion (which means ALL BULLSHIT gets a good ol Marine Corps boot in the ass)

MY COMMENT (DC N8IVE 45 YEARS)

6, I hear you.  Not picking sides just offering interpretation.  TO A PRESIDENT  SO NOVEL AND ILL VERSED IN POLITICS, yet business savvy enough to play by the rules, which he bends yet did NOT make (bankruptcy)  Trump plays the business game of MIGHT not RIGHT.
Feel cutbacks everywhere are to show on the backend that Trump did more to reign in spending than to reflect whether worthy causes were cut.  end doesnt justify the means unless it reflects well on Trump.
my fear is where govt cuts, citizens will attempt to fill the void caused.   Where they cannot, Trump will call Darwinism.  I expect the average age to go down these four years.  God bless our Men n Women in Uniform.

RESPONSE TO MY COMMENT
By original postor 6GUNNER (Military)

⬆That was retrospective & introspective at the same time. Quite the broad & awesome outlook.

What happened at your BBQ RABBIT PARTY?

FACEBOOK POST TODAY
THANKS H.H.

Omgosh! We went to Burger king for a late lunch and when we were bout to leave this older black lady came in looking like a train wreck with huge 80's lip stick on and a rag on her head and looked like the lady on cable a long time ago that was like Jamaican and would read your future or some shit. Then she was talking about how pretty my daughter is. So we left and as we were walking home she waived me down so i walked up to her and she gave my daughter a bag of easter candy she had bought. She proceeded to tell me that my daughter looked just like her daughters did and that she had twins by rape when she was 9. So you know the eyebrow goes up when she said 9 but i'm going to shine her on as my eldest brother used to say. She goes off on this tangent about her uncle being some pro wrestler that raped her and i'm still listening because i know nothing about wresting. She's telling me how he shot her in the head 3 times and she been shot in the heart 6 times and the leg and it's totally wild and then she says that her dad is Clint Eastwood and at that point the alarms were sounding in my head. Then she was rambling something else about her dad being the head of General Motors or some shit and i'm like ok, thanks for the candy. Gotta go.

(Great SAVE, HH.)

MY COMMENT:

i know rite.  hate it when the stories detract from the point... kudos for staying on point... "thanks for the candy."
makes me wonder how shit went down when the first Easter basket was given...
"Here children.  Have this glorious basket of candy. Chocolate eggs AND the marshmallow bunnies that laid them."  What thr muva you say? A bunny laid a egg? what happened to the chicken.  he was ... 3x and the rabbit was so fast he stepped in to take attention off the chicken.  Well what happened to the chicken? 
With the Easter bunny's newfound stardom also came the origin of bbq chicken.  I love Easter.

Mr President Gets His Picture Taken

ok picture almost perfect
ok move 1 step to your left
no no no. that wont work.
ok go back.
close your eyes.
open eyes button coat
ok gud
take 3 steps right. ah choo.
ok 3 baby steps right...
where's the President.
Did somebody take the President
Who took the President?

😎😁😎 reasons NOT to get a RUSSIAN
PHOTOGRAPHER

joking. theyre friends

Purina Dog Food Troubles Escallate

The Purina Diet (Joke) is not all it is CRACKed up to be.

So I'm at Wal-Mart buying a bag of dog food for my dog. While in the check-out line, a woman behind me asked if I had a dog. Why else would I be buying dog food, RIGHT??? So on impulse I told her that no, I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again, and that I probably shouldn't because I ended up ...in the hospital last time, but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in intensive care with tubes coming out of every orifice and IVs in both arms. I told her that it was essentially a Perfect Diet and all you do is load your pockets with it and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry. The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that practically everyone in line was now enthralled with my story.) Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to sniff a poodle's ass and a car hit me. I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack he was laughing so hard. Better watch what you ask me and be prepared for my answer. I have all the time in the world to think of crazy things to say.
Now that you've read this I have to confess, I copied it. Now copy and share make someone else laugh.
Mr H

Dear Mr H,
I was planning to do exactly as you mention at the end, because ever since the first time I was hopitalized from the Purina Dog Food diet, my tongue has been hanging out my mouth seemlessly and uncontrolably, but its occurrance increases the closer I get the ball to the hole.

MJ in NC

online

http://pietschsoft.com/post/2008/02/14/The-Purina-Diet-7bJoke7d

funEbone